Seeing the Ribbon

I have to admit, the novelty is wearing off.

No, I'm not talking about running, thank God. I'm hoping with the endless amount of races to complete and PRs to set, that it'll be awhile before I tire of it again.

I'm talking about my summer job. Internship to be exact. After a week of being a glorified internet surfer, I'm just a little tired of the 9 to 5 grind (8 to 4:30 actually). If I were given more assignments I think I'd be less disappointed, but there tends to be that downtime that makes the day crawl by. I end up lounging in my cube, scrolling through Mark Remy's Daily Blog on runnersworld.com (Un)fortunately, I've been able to update myself on every one of his blogs since December 2008. I've learned a lot of useful information (and laughed out loud a few times as well), but mostly I find myself in a state of ennui.

If you'd have told me this 3, 4, 5 years ago I'd be shocked, but: running has become the high point of my day. In my spare time, I dabble over mapmyrun.com and pick out my path for the afternoon. I average my splits and shop for running gear. And when I get home, I throw on my shoes and I'm free. Running is the only thing that keeps my days the least bit interesting. Everyday between 8 and 4:30 it's the same tasks, the same duties. When 5:15 rolls around? Maybe I'll try that new route through the IMA gardens today. Or maybe I'll go to the track for repeats (ha), or maybe I'll do a tempo on Meridian. It's what keeps my days exciting.

If I had this job for an undetermined amount of time, I might just go crazy. I can't imagine knowing that you're going to be heading to the same office, to the same cubicle to the end of time (hey, there's nothing else on the horizon! Who says it won't be the end of time?). I like having that end date in sight (although the exact date is yet to be determined). It's the like the finish ribbon at the end of the race. Something to shoot for. When your legs are aching and your lungs are burning and you're just about to give up, you crest that hill and you see the ribbon. A renewed source of energy! Adrenaline, that extra push to the finish. You could never have gone that fast if the end hadn't been in sight. And thus, the end date.

So, that brings me to my revelation: I'm in trouble. I graduate from college in less than a year, and I need to find a job that will satisfy my need for the end date. I need to see a ribbon every so often to keep me going. And, in this economy, I should really be grateful for any employment, ribbon or not. It's got me thinking a lot about my options and choices for the future. All the while, the clock at the college finish line is ticking.

I've been thinking for a few years now about what might of been had I chosen education as my major. I wanted to be a teacher until my sophomore year in HS when I decided that foreign ambassador would better suit me. Really? Did I just plan on graduating from college and having the president say, "Hey you! That scrawny 21-year-old over there! Yeah you! Wanna be ambassador to France?" Yah. I think I just wanted to hang out on the Champs-Elysees, sipping cafe au lait and reading Le Monde.

So what about teaching interests me? The kids of course. The ability to make a difference and see that difference through. The multiple fields in which I could work (foreign language, english, journalism). The opportunity to coach. And, of course, the ribbon. In late spring each year, I'd have a ribbon. I've been told that I'd make a good teacher. By parents of kids I've babysat for, by employers at the camp I worked at, by the teacher in my education class (I feel like he'd be a good judge of that stuff, maybe?). Originally I thought intermediate education would be right for me.. like 3rd through 8th graders, but the more I think about it, the more high school education intrigues me. (Oops, I mean, high school education).

But I think it's already too late to make those decisions. I already decided on one route and I really can't deviate this close to the finish line. I just hope I'm happy in whatever I end up doing and don't keep wondering "what if".

Until then... 6-7 weeks to the ribbon.